08 May 2011

Beautiful in my eyes

Listen to this audio while reading!:

My momma and I are extremely different from each other. She always complains about how my room is such a mess, how I don't return stuff to where they really belong, etc. Sometimes, she and I are alike. My friends say they see the similarities in the way we look or in the way that we act. Most people know me for being loud and for someone who curses a lot. But thanks to my mom, I also know how to dress and act like a lady (it helps when we enter five-star hotels or dine in fancy restaurants!).

Like any other mom-daughter relationship, we had our downs. Since we were different from each other, we didn't get along that well (not to mention we come from different generations). She was more a mother than a friend to me and that fact had its pros and cons. I wasn't able to talk to her as I would to a friend, so there were things that I obviously couldn't tell her. I know she wanted to work this out and during later teenage years, I saw that she tried her best to befriend me. But of course, that didn't work as much as I wanted it to. She was probably scared that I might not see her as a mother figure anymore- but that was false. I feared her so much, and I tried to live up to her expectations as much as I could. On the flip side, her being a mother to me was probably one of life's best lessons. God knows I struggled and I rebelled against her rules. She always saw through me and always found out! Hehehe.

Despite the hardships that we've gone through together, I think we have emerged beautifully as stronger, better individuals with a better grasp on faith, hope and love. I haven't been living with her for more than a year and it's been hard. I think that it will always be hard. Nevertheless, I love her no less and I will love her with all my heart for always :-)

Dearest mom,

You are everything to me and you know that. I might have not been the best daughter and we might not have a perfect relationship but I need you to know that I love you and I always will. I will be the best person that you have always wanted me to be and I will make you proud. Thank you for being the person to have sacrificed so much to help me survive this crazy world. Thank you for being there for me a million percent of the time and I know I can never repay you for all the things you have done for me. I know that I have hurt you so much and it haunts me. But I just rest my soul on the fact that you have always influenced me and taken care of me and given me the best that you can. Don't you ever think that goes to waste! :-) When I look at your photo in FaceBook, I can see that you are smiling and are as beautiful as ever. You will always be the love of my life and never think otherwise. I love you and I miss you so much, mom! Happy momma's day! :-)

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